Member-only story
I have a strange and complex relationship with Pride month. There’s always a part of me that says, “If seeing a Coke ad with a rainbow flag makes some young kid feel accepted enough to come out, then it’s not a bad thing.” At the same time, I feel it’s also become a time where people pat themselves on the back for being ‘allies,’ for caring so much about the queer community, without ever really understanding what being an ally entails. Worse, I’ve started to feel that those same people, the ones that tell us on Twitter that they’re an ally because they placed a rainbow emoji after their name, are the reason we aren’t making more progress.
I acknowledge that’s quite the claim, and I promise I’ll explain, but, if you’ll allow me a moment, I want to talk about the difference between a good and bad ally. A good ally should use their power, their platform, their voice to help focus on the voices of others, while a bad ally focuses themselves, and talks about how much of an ally they are. This is an important but often subtle distinction, so let’s look at a clear example:
Consider a producer of a popular show, or another person who has a decently sized follower count (let’s assume 15k or higher) and can affect change in a…
